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Automatic TRANSCRIPT

Coach. Angela Pew here. Coaching you to get that sober life you want and as usual. We have a fantastic guest today to share a great story of inspiration in recovery and all that stuff that we love. Let's take a minute and welcome shelley to the show. Hi Shelley thank you for being here with us. Yeah thank you to intellect for having me on your show. I'm really excited that I get to talk. Yeah take a minute and tell everybody a little bit about you and your journey in recovery. Well I am originally from a small town in Pennsylvania Newcastle and that was really where the seed was planted for me to admit that I was an alcoholic attic. Take the necessary steps. I needed to our regained in. Get back the life that I always wanted to have sober and Just kind of released me from all the bad habits and obstacles of holding me back so I went to Rehab and I started you know my journey clean and sober and site. Check myself into Rehab. But I got to the point of losing my independence and I had move in with my dad. And that caused me to look at things within and Finally admit I was in a halt and addict in dig really deep into that and a lot of soul searching and it took a while to really accept that in a really do the work that talked to gain my independence facts. So you know once. I checked myself in Rehab. I started going to meetings. I got a sponsor I started working. Twelve stabs and by working a program of recovery a gave me the ability and the opportunity to move to Columbus Ohio and be independent against. I put two and a half three years sober together out in what I had to do. I had to cut out a lot of people places and things You know people in friends that I love unconditionally to this day but I had to get back my life and my sense of self and purpose and alcohol and drugs were holding him back for a very long time too long. But I wasn't quite ready to do the work and to put all my heart and soul into that because as we all know it so cunning baffling powerful when it it sneaks up on you when you least expect it so you gotta stay vigilant and working for a bank now. It's the longest amount of time that I worked for a certain company over ten years. Now I'm really thankful grateful and proud of that and I owe that to being in a in a program but I also that too many other are resources in avenues. Because it's not only about me putting down the drugs and alcohol. It's just really about me. Finding my true sense of self and purpose and passion getting back doing all the things I love to do today. One of the things I would really love to explore is how you made the decision to go to treatment and I ask this because I think you know I've worked the frontlines of addiction As an interventionist as a counselor as a coach for many many years so that world is very second nature to me. You know I I relationship so treatment centers all over the world and I've been helping families do that stuff so treatment to me seems very normal. It's almost like the natural progression when you're trying to get sober figure things out but I know to the general public so to speak and people that are really in the beginning of this journey and figuring out if they're in alcoholics if they're not an alcoholic like what was it for you that made you say okay. I've been battling this on my own. It's not working. I think I better see a higher level of care and do inpatient treatment after I went to Rehab. It still took me a long time. You know before admitted I was an alcoholic. It was still there was still so much. Shame and just disappointment in combination of things just took me and I was just so stubborn you know and in many different attempt for me and I mean numerous different sobriety dates But it wasn't until I went all in it and truly work the program and what my rock bottom was at the time was I lost. My apartment lost my job and I went to move in with my dad and you know he's a loving and caring person. You know nothing against living with him but myself and my being one more in new I was capable of a lot more just having a better life by stopping the drinking and the drugs and I wanted to be independent again and I knew that if I continue to drink and use drugs that you know I've already was in jail from it. I already lost jobs when you finally your beatdown fill so hopeless and desperate inside and you're willing to try anything in and not until you truly surrender and be willing to do whatever it takes. I'm you're just GONNA so like you're beating your head against the wall. I've tried tried it on my own. I could stop couldn't stay staw- I knew I had a problem. But it's one thing to know you have a problem but you have to be really ready to quit and to do whatever it takes well and it really it really is very much a mindset to and I think that's a stumbling block for people so often is people get caught in this mindset of. Oh I'm GONNA stop for a little while and then I'll be able to control it again. You know like they kind of WanNa do it half way and the truth is I've never in my lifetime. Met a non alcoholic person that wondered if they weren't alcoholic or a non alcoholic person. That said you know what I really need to take a break for a while you know. Non Alcoholic people. Just don't have those thoughts and if you're in that mindset that you're GonNa have asked it or you're trying to manipulate the system. It's like you're trying to manipulate yourself and convince yourself that you don't have a problem if you're in that mindset it's going to be nothing but a struggle you really have to get to a place that you're done with it in that you understand. This isn't the life I want anymore. I don't want to drink anymore. It's not that I want to drink like other people drink. I don't WANNA drink period. It does not serve me. It doesn't do anything for me. It is not good for me. There are a lot of issues that come with a willingness to drink poison on a regular basis. There's a lot of self esteem stuff that comes with that. I mean there's a lot. It's a lot to unpack. You know being an alcoholic or having addiction whatever when you started looking for treatment or when you decided to go to treatment. How did you pick where you went? I'm always curious about this too. I worked in Pittsburgh Pennsylvania at the time and it was back at the time. The real estate market was crashing. I knew the company was gonNA close anyways so I wanted to just you know I knew I had health insurance. So that's why I went to my boss and said Look I. I got a problem with alcohol. So did you just Google it. I mean did you ask people for recommendations. Did you call Your Insurance Company? Like how did you decide where to go? Yeah I actually just called my insurance company recommendations Orien- so yeah I mean I. I drove myself there after one last run and I think it was over Christmas time. I two thousand and seven. I believe I do believe there is no one size fits all right. And that's why like I have the recovery toolbox. It's about building your toolbox full of tools. How things work for you because we are all a little bit different in those ways and I love meetings in love a and there's a lot of stuff I don't like about a I think a is this brilliant thing that gives you a cheat sheet for a life of recovery. It's like they put it all together for you in this nice little package and all you have to do is walk in the room right. You've got support you've got love. You've got acceptance. You've got people that understand what you're going through because we're all going through the same staff you've got friends to talk to people to hang out with like it's a package deal in. Its nominal ride the same time. I don't care if somebody else doesn't like it if you don't WanNa go don't go. I don't care but you have to do. Some thing is give it a try is what I say. Try It out you know at first you know. I had to take what I needed and leave the rest behind and you know and it was just about showing up into eventually you know it could sink in because in the beginning it's like I was such a mess. I couldn't even complete a sentence and I'm just very thankful that I had somebody you know before me that led me to to